MARRIAGE TIPS:ENCOURAGEMENT

ENCOURAGEMENT 

A better focus
Put aside your spouse’s past failures or poor decisions and focus on his or her victories! If you believe in your spouse and encourage their good qualities, they will grow – and your love will too.

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Eye up your spouse at home and in public – and let them see you doing it! A classic full-body once-over, plus a wink and a suggestive eyebrow raise, conveys the message, I like what I see!
 
Positive affirmationWhen was the last time you spoke words of affirmation to your spouse? Over time, it may not come to mind as readily as it did early in your relationship. Intentional affirmation will not only encourage your spouse, but also strengthen those bonds of affection. Tell your spouse what you love and admire about them today!

Remember to thank your spouseRather than criticizing your spouse for forgetting to carry out a particular task, thank them for all the times they remembered to fulfill their responsibility.
I’m thankful for you because . . .Even after the Thanksgiving holidays, tell your spouse 10 things about them that you’re thankful for. On an everyday basis, strive to cultivate an attitude of thankfulness for each other, focusing on the positive qualities of your spouse instead of the negative. Often, we easily take our loved ones for granted and only look at what they lack according to our expectations. Constantly measuring up your spouse to those expectations will guarantee your disappointment and marital dissatisfaction. Instead, choose to adopt a thankful perspective and ask God for help to let go of unrealistic or selfish expectations. You’ll find through ups and downs, learning to be thankful for how God has made your mate will greatly strengthen your marriage.

Tractor beamDo you wish your spouse would help out around the house more often? When you catch them doing a small chore, such as chopping veggies, surprise them with a hug from behind and murmur, “Mmm, magnetic attraction!” They’ll soon be looking for other ways to earn an appreciative snuggle.

Keep the compliments comingWhen life gets busy, it’s often hard to take a moment to say what you admire about your spouse. Keep the spark alive by remembering to tell your love how beautiful or handsome they are, or letting them know you noticed how good they look in today’s outfit. Small words of admiration can make a big difference in your relationship!

Acknowledge changePeople constantly change, but married couples sometimes begin to take each other for granted and stop seeing these changes. This can make each spouse feel ignored, unnoticed or – even worse – unwanted. Take a moment every day to verbally acknowledge a new thing in your spouse. This can be something as simple as complimenting a new shirt, or deeper issues like discussing a new view of a Bible verse. Regularly doing this can help show your spouse that you’re aware of them and engaged in their personal development.

Verbalize your thanksThank your spouse regularly. Expressing your thanks doesn’t just make your spouse feel loved, appreciated and wanted, but it also helps to remind you of their positive qualities. When showing your gratitude, focus on the person and not the action or object. For example, say "You're an amazing cook" instead of "Thanks for making lunch."